When I was a little girl, my grandmother would hum an old Yoruba song as she went about her day. The lyrics lingered in the air like a gentle caution: "Eni aye nye ko maa sora o, ayo la'kere fi'se ntan"—a poetic reminder that misery often tricks joy into doing its work. It’s a line I’ve carried with me, like an heirloom of wisdom. It reminds me to tread carefully, to find balance, and to approach life with a certain mindful restraint.
Now, don’t get me wrong—I'm all about enjoyment. If you’ve been following my newsletters, you know that finding joy is practically my life’s thesis. But even joy needs boundaries. There’s a fine line between indulgence and carelessness, between pushing ourselves to extremes and knowing when to pull back. This is where the art of moderation comes in—a space where we can thrive without burning out, enjoy without regret, and succeed without self-destruction.
Modern culture loves extremes. Hustle culture tells us to "rise and grind" until we’ve got nothing left to give. Fitness culture dares us to go "beast mode" every single day. Even our social lives are saturated with FOMO-inducing narratives: if you’re not all-in, you’re missing out. It’s no wonder that the middle ground feels like uncharted territory—it’s simply not as glamorous. But extremes come with a cost. Research shows that chronic overcommitment, whether in work, relationships, or personal goals, leads to higher rates of burnout, anxiety, and dissatisfaction. A 2019 study by Gallup found that 23% of employees experience burnout often, while 44% feel it sometimes. And it’s not just about work—this phenomenon bleeds into all aspects of life. The thing is, extremes are intoxicating because they give us the illusion of control. If I’m working 12-hour days, I must be successful. If I’m partying every weekend, I must be living my best life. But as that Yoruba song warns, misery often wears the mask of joy. Sooner or later, it reveals its true face.
Moderation isn’t as exciting as extremes, but it’s the quiet hero of sustainable success and happiness. Psychologists refer to it as the "Goldilocks Principle"—not too much, not too little, but just right. A life of moderation creates room for longevity, adaptability, and most importantly, balance. Take Serena Williams, for instance. Her legendary career wasn’t just built on hard work and intensity—it was also about knowing when to step back. After having her daughter, Serena openly discussed prioritizing her health and family, even if it meant fewer tournaments. That’s moderation in action: the ability to focus on what truly matters without being consumed by any one thing. Even in pop culture, we’re seeing a shift toward embracing the middle ground. Shows like The Bear celebrate the messiness of trying hard but not striving for perfection. The internet is slowly warming up to the idea that “soft life” isn’t about laziness—it’s about intentionality. Moderation is the new rebellion.
This topic has been on my mind thanks to my doctor, who reminded me this week to prioritize my health and suggested I spend more time in rest mode. A concept I can’t even fathom during Dubai’s event season. I realized I’ve overcommitted myself to a series of things that are well beyond my social battery and capacity, and it’s catching up with me. Between a pamper day at Stay Flawless Beauty Lounge in Town Square, brunch with fashion brand Never Fully Dressed to preview their latest collection, the launch of Kayali’s Yum Boujee Marshmallow perfume by Mona Kattan, a visit to the Nature Fair Market at Al Barari with family and friends, and a tour of the newly launched J1 Beach—a stunning beachfront destination with 13 luxury beach clubs and restaurants—it’s been a whirlwind. This weekend, we’re dining at Akabeko, our new client on the Palm and Dubai’s first table-top Yakiniku Japanese restaurant serving premium A5 Wagyu, followed by hosting a private fashion event at So Much Trouble. Moderation? Not this week. But it’s a reminder that I need to slow down, even if it means missing out.
Life will always have moments that demand our all, whether it’s a career-defining project, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, or even an emotional crisis. But those moments should be exceptions, not the rule. Moderation is the habit that allows us to show up for those extremes without losing ourselves in them. As my grandmother’s song reminds us, joy and misery often walk hand in hand. Our job is to navigate life with care, to carve out a space where joy isn’t fleeting or deceptive, but deeply rooted and genuine.
Wishing you a lovely weekend and take it jeje…
Zainab x